lmy v.s. tt

if u have read my previous posts..then i should noe bout this guy which im gonna mention later...

wel,i used to like this guy so much..when i was in form 3..i admired him as a bro..as time past on,i found myself in love wit him!i really like him!i cried under my pillow when he left to further his studies...people out there just claimed tat im pretty silly,i thought da same too!whenever i see a guy which attracts me..i'l tell myself tat i like him n nobody could have replaced him..somehow,i just dunno how i feel towards him!da feelings are getting lesser n lesser as other guys appeared to be really good in my life!

i stil remember tat i used to add him in friendster,where i was soo nervous bout it!it has been a year where there are no testi,msg.....from him or from me to him!well,im trying to get myself out of it,perhaps i just wan him to my bro...i would be so happie to have such a lovely bro...sometimes,i just dun believe my feeling which i found myself dun miss him anymore,not thinking bout him anymore,where does he stand in my list?where is his position?i dun see him there instead some1 is at da top of my list!!!i felt bad bout it!

wel,i dunno whether those feelings are right or wrong until da day where i act got a chance to chat wit him on9..i was kinda happie at first...but it seemed to happed in a moment...i was kinda shocjed wit it!when my fren just added him into conversation,i was kinda nervous cos wut should i talk to him....da moment where my heartbeat wasn't there,i knew it!!!!perhaps there is some1 who just replaced him lol!he just couldn't melt me off!!!how could it be??i had waited soo long,and now came da chance to noe him better..how can it happened?!where goes my feeling?why did i feel in such a way tat i had totally no feeling at all!?so wasted!!itz all fated where i always believe in relationship!!!haha..sounds serious?anywayz,i'l be very glad if hez willing to be my bro!

im getting really sad n frustrating bout not receiving a msg from a person who i concern so much...there might a few persons,which u might be thinking,but then itz act one person...wel, i just another msg from a fren...a greeting msg for cny celebration..im erally happy to receive msgs from my frens...somehow i shouldn't be sooo greedy wit my life!i used to send him a greeting msg during xmas,but he dun reply me...this makes me never send him another greeting msg on da new year eve...all my frens were asking me to call him,msg him,chat wit him....
i would like to say tat im a gal,itz kinda tough for me to begin everything!!!u might say tat who cares if u get him...but it seems toughlol...sometimes i just feel tat im wasting my time or even think tat im pretty silly...is tat love?i mean i like some1,and u just hope hez in a good condition,living a happy life,be there for him no matter wut happen.....i dunno!?